Men typically say what we mean, and mean EXACTLY what we say. This isn’t the Da Vinci Code we are talking about here. We do not speak in code hoping that the message is correctly deciphered.
Men are taught at a young age to treat women with respect. Chivalry isn’t dead ladies. It’s just taken a new look. I believe a happy wife equals a happy life.
Take for instance, when we ask our significant other where she wants to go for dinner; we are genuinely asking you to pick what you want. “I don’t know, what do you want” is often the response we get. Trust me, we want you to pick what you want. Please don’t read into the question and choose the place you think we want to go. It’s a lovely gesture, but we will not notice. We usually don’t read that much into a situation like that. We want you to be happy, plain and simple. So pick a restaurant, any restaurant. We can usually eat just about anything that is put in front of us.
Most of us have probably fallen victim to the dreaded trap when it comes to gifts. Men usually love getting some sort of new tool we can tinker with in the garage. But God forbid we actually remember hearing you say, “we need a new washing machine.” We immediately think, that’s what she wants. We unknowingly walk right into that trap of giving appliances as gifts and suffer the consequences. Of course we immediately know we have made a terrible mistake once we see the look on your face. Then to make matters worse, the dreaded silent treatment occurs. All this time, we thought we did well because we remembered what you said you wanted. Remember ladies; this is the type of communication we are looking for. If you say you want it, it usually registers.
Women never forget anything, so making the poor choice of purchasing an appliance as a birthday or, even worse, anniversary gift will usually haunt us for the entire relationship. Women will file this incident away as ammunition to use against us in the future arguments.
Men do not hold grudges with our significant others. Once the conversation has been had, we usually let it go. This is not the case when it comes to women and disagreements. Once the discussion begins, the ammo starts to flow from anywhere and everywhere.
We are baffled by this approach. We think all past problems have been resolved. We don’t know how to retackle every problem that has ever occurred in the relationship all at once. We are usually left standing there trying to remember every little detail that you are rattling off one by one. There is that stupid washing machine I got you for your birthday again. Meanwhile, all we are thinking are things like “this is all because I forgot to lift the toilet seat this morning?”
Zachary, the article is an opinion piece. By definition, the author is obligated to write his or her opinion. I submit that Matt Coburn is just as entitled to his opinion as Zachary Talbot is to his. God bless America and God bless The Signal and its reporters. Amen. 🙂
As a man, this article does not speak for me. It reinforces negative gender stereotypes from a heteronormative perspective; it presupposes that all straight relationships (the only ones worth mentioning apparently) are like this. The tone cries, “REAL men are x, y, z” and “Ha, women…am I right guys?”
When contemporary American society punishes, often violently, those who do not adhere to gender norms, publishing nonsense that reinforces this narrative is irresponsible and regressive.